Have Yourselves a Fabulous Day
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A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out.
Her boss, concerned about his employee's well being, asks sympathetically, "What's the matter?"
The blonde replies, "Early this morning I got a phone call saying that my mother had passed away."
"I'm terribly sorry to hear that. Why don't you go home for the day... we aren't terribly busy. Just take the day off to relax and rest."
The blonde very calmly explains, "No, I'd be better off here. I need to keep my mind off it and I have the best chance of doing that here."
The boss agrees and allows the blonde to work as usual.
"If you need anything, just let me know," he says.
A few hours pass and the boss decides to check on the blonde. He looks out over his office and sees the blonde crying hysterically. He rushes out to her, and asks, "Are you going to be okay?
Is there anything I can do to help?"
"No," replies the blonde,
"I just got a call from my sister, and she said that HER mom died too!"
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When the Surgeon came to see his blonde patient on the day after her operation, she asked him somewhat hesitantly just how long it would be before she could resume her sex life.
"Uh, I hadn't really thought about it," admitted the stunned Surgeon.
"You're the first one ever to ask that after a tonsillectomy."
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A Blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead are stuck on an island.
One day, the three of them are walking along the beach and discover a magic lamp. They rub and rub, and sure enough, out pops a genie.
The genie says, "Since I can only grant three wishes, you may each have one."
The Brunette says, "I've been stuck here for years. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I just want to go home."
POOF! The Brunette gets her wish and she is returned to her family.
Then, the Redhead says, "I've been stuck here for years as well. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I wish I could go home too."
POOF! The Redhead gets her wish and she is returned to her family.
The Blonde starts crying uncontrollably.
The genie asks, "My dear, what's the matter?"
The Blonde whimpers, "I wish my friends were still here."
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A Blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open, exposing one of her breasts.
A nearby policeman approaches her and remarks,
"Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?"
"Why, officer?" asks the Blonde.
"Because your blouse is open and your breast is exposed."
"Oh my goodness," exclaims the Blonde,
"I left my baby on the bus!"
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A Circus Owner runs an ad for a lion tamer and two young people show up.
One is a good looking guy in his mid- twenties and the other is a gorgeous Blonde about the same age.
The Circus Owner tells them, "I'm not going to sugar coat it.
This is one ferocious lion.
He ate my last tamer so you both better be good or you're history.
Here's your equipment - a chair, a whip, and a gun.
Who wants to try out first?"
The girl says, "I'll go first."
She walks past the chair, the whip and the gun and steps right into the lion's cage.
The lion starts to snarl and pant and begins to charge her, so she throws open her coat revealing her beautiful naked body.
The lion stops dead in his tracks, sheepishly crawls up to her and starts licking her ankles.
He continues to lick her calves, kisses them, and then rests his head at her feet.
The Circus Owner's mouth is on the floor.
He remarks,"I've never seen a display like that in my life."
He then turns to the young man and asks, "Can you top that?"
"No problem," replies the young man,
"just get that Lion out of the way."
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regards
minir
Thursdays Giggles
-
arkie
- Regular Member
- Posts: 166
- Joined: Fri Jul 20, 2001 12:01 pm
- Location: Live in AR but I'm a Texan!
Re: Thursdays Giggles
Originally posted by minir
Have Yourselves a Fabulous Day
"I left my baby on the bus!"
minir
minir:
LOL! And I did laugh out loud!
I have one for you.
An older man had an appointment to see a urologist who shared an office with several other doctors. The waiting room was filled with patients. He noticed that the receptionist was a very large, unfriendly woman who looked like a Sumowrestler. He gave her his name.
In a very loud voice, the receptionist said, "YES, I HAVE YOUR NAME HERE; YOU WANT TO SEE THE DOCTOR ABOUT IMPOTENCE, RIGHT?" All the patients in the waiting room snapped their heads around to look at the very embarrassed man.
He recovered quickly though, and in an equally loud voice replied, "NO, I'VE COME TO INQUIRE ABOUT A SEX CHANGE OPERATION BUT I DON'T WANT THE SAME DOCTOR THAT DID YOURS."
Thanks,
arkie
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