Helping to get the word out about Gay and Lezbian support groups turns bad?

CiscoKid · Post by **CiscoKid** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 9:56 am

http://www.recordnet.com/daily/news/art ... 80701.html

This article was done by my local paper to help get information about gay and lezbian support groups around the Stockton area out for those who need them. Since yesterday when the article ran, my mother who does home child care, has lost the last few clients she had after the other parents left because of being arrested for drug charges

RoundEye · Post by **RoundEye** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 11:34 am

I'm a little lost onyour post.

...........my mother who does home child care, has lost the last few clients she had after the other parents left because of being arrested for drug charges....................

Were the parents arrested for drug charges and that made other parents leave, because your mom also takes care of the kids of the arrested parents?

Sorry about my inability to comprehend your post

It's a shame how homophobic people are. When I was a kid a guy in the neighborhood used to fix bikes and sell them to kids and adults. When the people found out he was gay, they made their kids stay away from him. I was ten at the time and my mom asked me if he ever tried to touch me or fool around with me in any kind of way. When I told her "no", she said it was ok for me to still go over there and get parts for my bikes. Other than that question all she said was that if ever tried to do anything to let her know right away. As for as I know he never tried or did anything with any kid or adult up untill he moved away.

MadDoctor · Post by **MadDoctor** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 11:40 am

Thank goodness we’re still evolving as a society. I look forward to the day when “labeling people” will be a thing of the past.

CiscoKid · Post by **CiscoKid** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 11:40 am

Originally posted by RoundEye
I'm a little lost onyour post.

Were the parents arrested for drug charges and that made other parents leave, because your mom also takes care of the kids of the arrested parents?

It was a family with three kids. the mothers, lezbian lovers, were both charged with drug possesion and got sent back and their kids taken away...again

CiscoKid · Post by **CiscoKid** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 11:41 am

If you guys, spread the word about this article. Many teens need to know they are not alone!!!

crazyman · Post by **crazyman** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 11:44 am

Originally posted by RoundEye
I'm a little lost onyour post.

Were the parents arrested for drug charges and that made other parents leave, because your mom also takes care of the kids of the arrested parents?

Sorry about my inability to comprehend your post

I did'nt understand where he was going with the post either,maybe he could clear it up a little.

my take on it is this,I am open minded about gays and lesbians,it's not an issue with me.

drug abuse IS an issue with me.!!

crazyman · Post by **crazyman** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 11:46 am

Originally posted by CiscoCert
If you guys, spread the word about this article. Many teens need to know they are not alone!!!

you mean teens that are gay or lesbian?

well if thats it,then you and that article are right,I live close to you,and I know the san juaqin valley well,and visit there often,so I know it is quite conservative and must be a tough place to live for gays and lesbians.

CiscoKid · Post by **CiscoKid** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 11:58 am

Originally posted by crazyman

you mean teens that are gay or lesbian?

well if thats it,then you and that article are right,I live close to you,and I know the san juaqin valley well,and visit there often,so I know it is quite conservative and must be a tough place to live for gays and lesbians.

Yeah. my sister had a hard time untill she met the people mentioned in the article. It's like being alone in a sea of people, if they knew the truth, you would be hurt by everyone!!!

crazyman · Post by **crazyman** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 12:09 pm

Originally posted by CiscoCert

Yeah. my sister had a hard time untill she met the people mentioned in the article. It's like being alone in a sea of people, if they knew the truth, you would be hurt by everyone!!!

so you're saying that because your sister is lesbian ,your mom's daycare business lost customers?

thats sucks!

one more time though,what does the arrests for drugs have to do with it?

mikemean · Post by **mikemean** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 12:13 pm

The article is not showing up for me. I would really like to see it. Glad to see you guys are supportive of gayz and lezbians

crazyman · Post by **crazyman** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 12:16 pm

Originally posted by mikemean
The article is not showing up for me. I would really like to see it. Glad to see you guys are supportive of gayz and lezbians

Hi Mike,goodmorning!

that link to the article is not working for me now either,it was a little while ago.

try again later.have a good day dude.

CiscoKid · Post by **CiscoKid** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 12:37 pm

Originally posted by crazyman

so you're saying that because your sister is lesbian ,your mom's daycare business lost customers?

thats sucks!

one more time though,what does the arrests for drugs have to do with it?

Now there are NO MORE KIDS!!!

CiscoKid · Post by **CiscoKid** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 12:38 pm

Originally posted by mikemean
The article is not showing up for me. I would really like to see it. Glad to see you guys are supportive of gayz and lezbians

The site was updated. I have a copy of it I will post the entire article a little later.

Paft · Post by **Paft** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 1:53 pm

I can understand the homophobia in society. You'd be afraid as well if a gay/lez tried to hit on you, or you had the fear of that. For most straight people, it's a "Trust can't be given, it must be earned" thing.

(If anything in the above statement offended, tell me and I will change/remove it.)

Gaming-Module · Post by **Gaming-Module** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 2:00 pm

Astounding!

This thread is about persecuting people because of their own personal practices.

People that are shunned, harrassed by law enforcement, attacked physically and verbally by the masses, and just generally kicked around in every other aspect of life - just like the Jews in Rome - and you still find it suitable to bring up "Gays hitting on heteros", thus indicating your own homophobia and insecurity with your sexuality.

Amazing...

Paft · Post by **Paft** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 2:02 pm

Homophobia,Yes. I'm not ashaimed to admit that they scare me. I like my personal space, thank you.

I know I am straight though. Always have, and always will be. I'm not going to debate it on a forum, so if you feel the need to insult me more, it's AIM user Ibthar.

Gaming-Module · Post by **Gaming-Module** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 2:10 pm

Me insult you???

You are so terribly dense, I am afraid.

(There. I insulted you. Better?)

Paft · Post by **Paft** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 2:12 pm

Originally posted by Macho-Module
...thus indicating your own homophobia and insecurity with your sexuality.

If that wasn't a veiled insult, then I am the worst judge of character around. If it wasn't meant as an insult, then I apoligize.

Gaming-Module · Post by **Gaming-Module** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 2:16 pm

Not an insult, just fact. =0)

RoundEye · Post by **RoundEye** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 4:19 pm

Originally posted by CiscoCert

It was a family with three kids. the mothers, lezbian lovers, were both charged with drug possesion and got sent back and their kids taken away...again

Well I don't condemn or condone people who smoke pot. It's an adult choice, just like drinking. At least that's the way I see it.

But, I don't want to turn this into a another pro/con drug thread. I would've taken my kids out of their daycare in a heart-beat If I knew they had gotten arrested for drug use or possession. No telling what they are into or if they are dealing drugs. I wouldn't want my kids in or near that type of environment. Doesn't bother me if they are gay. Being gay doesn't rub-off on you and you can't catch "gayness" from drinking out of the same water fountain.

CiscoKid · Post by **CiscoKid** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 4:51 pm

Originally posted by RoundEye

Well I don't condemn or condone people who smoke pot. It's an adult choice, just like drinking. At least that's the way I see it.

But, I don't want to turn this into a another pro/con drug thread. I would've taken my kids out of their daycare in a heart-beat If I knew they had gotten arrested for drug use or possession. No telling what they are into or if they are dealing drugs. I wouldn't want my kids in or near that type of environment. Doesn't bother me if they are gay. Being gay doesn't rub-off on you and you can't catch "gayness" from drinking out of the same water fountain.

No one in my home, "Home Childcare", but rather the parents were arested

Humboldt · Post by **Humboldt** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 4:57 pm

Originally posted by Paft
Homophobia,Yes. I'm not ashaimed to admit that they scare me. I like my personal space, thank you.

So you're scared of gay men because they've hit on you?

By your logic, you'd be scared of women too, and resent their infringing on your personal space when they hit on you.

Just trying to make sense out of your post.

CiscoKid · Post by **CiscoKid** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 5:12 pm

Here's the article as it appeared in the paper

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally Published Tuesday, August 7, 2001
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Group has support for parents, gays
By Julie Davidow

Record Staff Writer

When Liz Lopez was 17, she told her mom she was talking to her girlfriend on the phone.

"Yeah, I know," Clara Lopez responded.

"No," Liz insisted. "It's my girlfriend."

"Yeah, I know," her mom repeated.

"We went back and forth like that," the elder Lopez said.

A few minutes later, mother and daughter realized they were talking about the same thing.

Liz is a lesbian.

She's also among the fortunate few gays and lesbians whose parents are entirely accepting of their sexuality.

"We just thought, 'Well, there's nothing we can do. She's still our daughter,' " said Clara Lopez. "It was just an everyday thing with us."

Still, Clara and Liz Lopez, who run a home day-care business together in Stockton, say they look for others who share their experience of being gay -- or having a gay child -- in a heterosexual culture.

They've found that support at Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays of San Joaquin, one of the few groups organized for gays and lesbians in San Joaquin County.

Shepherded by a new generation of leaders, PFLAG is up and running again after a one-year hiatus. Since January, the group has staged two fund-raisers, viewed films on gay issues and hosted speakers.

Unlike the Bay Area, resources for gays and lesbians in the San Joaquin County aren't always visible or readily accessible.

"There are other places gays and lesbians gather in Stockton, but you may not find them easily," said Stephanie Haffner, who moved from Berkeley to Stockton three years ago.

"I went to PFLAG for community. When it wasn't there, I definitely missed it," Haffner said.

Chris Nelson, a Latin teacher at Stagg High School, launched Stockton's first local PFLAG chapter in 1993.

"My daughter came out to me the spring before, and I was like, 'What am I supposed to do with this information?' " Nelson said.

About 40 people came to the first meeting, and the group continued under different leadership for about six years.

Nelson said she thinks organizers just ran out of steam. She moved on to found a Gay, Lesbian, Straight Education Network chapter in Stockton and to serve as the advisor of Stagg High's Gay Straight Alliance. Even those clubs have waned in recent years, she said. "Some organizations last forever, but they tend to be in the big cities, because there are probably enough people interested at any one time," she said.

Gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender teens are most at risk without a support network, experts say. Nearly 25 percent of teen suicides are gay-related, according to some estimates.

Peter Gahoub, an Edison High School graduate who came out before his senior year, considered suicide throughout his teens.

"I wasn't very accepting of myself," Gahoub said. "There were times when I thought about just lying in the street and letting a car run over me. I held a knife in my kitchen to my abdomen."

Gahoub grew up in a conservative Catholic family and relied on Ellen DeGeneres' national coming out and drag queens on daytime talk shows to learn about being gay. "I don't want any gay person going through what I went through," he said. "That's why I'm out. That's why I contacted PFLAG."

Despite her immediate family's openness, Liz Lopez said other relatives and strangers haven't always been understanding. When her parents renewed their wedding vows last year, she donned a tuxedo and escorted her then-girlfriend down the aisle.

"My godmother said, 'This is supposed to be your parents' day. Why are you taking the attention away from them?' " Liz Lopez recalled.

Reactions to rainbow stickers on their cars -- Clara and Liz both sport this commonly recognized gay symbol -- also are mixed.

Some people offer a thumbs up; others shout obscenities and homophobic slurs. "A guy driving by thought it was his duty to tell me I was a faggot," Clara Lopez said.

Gahoub and Liz Lopez said they still hesitate before clasping hands with a same-sex partner in public or planting a kiss on the other's cheek. "Holding my boyfriend's hand in public? That would be nice, but not anytime soon," Gahoub said.

Moving to a more accepting environment is appealing, but Liz Lopez said she'd rather work on changing attitudes in her hometown. "To me, (leaving) is like letting them win."

* To reach reporter Julie Davidow, phone 546-8294 or email
jdavidow@recordnet.com

PFLAG meetings
PFLAG meets from 7 to 9 p.m. on the second Monday of each month at Central United Methodist Church, Room 28, 3700 Pacific Ave. The next meeting will be Aug. Monday. Information: 870-3339

SannieRose · Post by **SannieRose** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:00 pm

I think what gay men do (in the privacy of the public restrooms and parks) is disgusting. Any man who gets off by manipulating another man's rectum (and feces) is IMO mentally ill. To think these guys serve us in restaurants and teach our children - makes me puke.

If they kept it in the bedrooms, their actions and behavior would not offend the senses. There's a public park here in Atlanta that you can't take your kids to because these men openly solicit sex 24/7. Unfortunately, these guys have no morals or ethics. They are as depraved as child molesters and should be treated accordingly.

messiah · Post by **messiah** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:05 pm

When the norm is no longer, the end is near.

most of society has been desensitized to homosexuality anyway. I still contest that it's not normal and is against the true design of mankind. Think about a couple of things. Gay couples can now biologically procreate. Over 1 million children can be spawned from a single shot of baby batter. The likelyhood of incest is damn near 90% over a 20year period.

SannieRose · Post by **SannieRose** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:14 pm

Desensitized? I will never accept the perverted, depraved, animalistic behavior of that segment of our society. They control the media and that gives the false perception that society as a whole are accepting it - bullsh*t!

CiscoKid · Post by **CiscoKid** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:26 pm

Originally posted by SannieRose
I think what gay men do (in the privacy of the public restrooms and parks) is disgusting. Any man who gets off by manipulating another man's rectum (and feces) is IMO mentally ill. To think these guys serve us in restaurants and teach our children - makes me puke.

If they kept it in the bedrooms, their actions and behavior would not offend the senses. There's a public park here in Atlanta that you can't take your kids to because these men openly solicit sex 24/7. Unfortunately, these guys have no morals or ethics. They are as depraved as child molesters and should be treated accordingly.

Not all gays and lesbians are like that. I know for a fact my sister is NOT like that.

If you were correct in your ideas, then Mike is a child molesting freak of nature? That I know to be false, from what i know of him, He is much like msot of us. Just searching for someone to grow old and die with. Gays, like straights are just looking for love and happiness

mikemean · Post by **mikemean** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:28 pm

Originally posted by CiscoCert

Not all gays and lesbians are like that. I know for a fact my sister is NOT like that.

If you were correct in your ideas, then Mike is a child molesting freak of nature? That I know to be false, from what i know of him, He is much like msot of us. Just searching for someone to grow old and die with. Gays, like straights are just looking for love and happiness

What he said

Paft · Post by **Paft** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:30 pm

So you're scared of gay men because they've hit on you?

By your logic, you'd be scared of women too, and resent their infringing on your personal space when they hit on you.

Just trying to make sense out of your post.

Wrong. I've never been hit on. I don't want to be, and that was my point. moving on...

If some gay/lez wants to move near me fine. I don't own the land, not my decision. But, I do not, ever, want to hear/see/hear about them doing their things. EVER. Nor do I want to talk to, see, or acknoweledge them. Society desensitized? My foot. The media wants you to think that.

(Edit: Mike, what is it like for you? I'm not being rude, but I would like to know why gays are attracted to the same sex. Is it forced, or like how you were raised? The more I know, the more accepting I may become, and this is an honest question.)

SannieRose · Post by **SannieRose** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:35 pm

I figured you would miss my point, so let me repeat it:

If they kept it in the bedrooms, their actions and behavior would not offend the senses.

If your sister solicits and performs sex in public places then she is no better than the deviates I have already described. Sorry buddy, homo's are sick and people like yourself only encourage their warped behavior.

mikemean · Post by **mikemean** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:37 pm

Originally posted by Paft

Wrong. I've never been hit on. I don't want to be, and that was my point. moving on...

If some gay/lez wants to move near me fine. I don't own the land, not my decision. But, I do not, ever, want to hear/see/hear about them doing their things. EVER. Nor do I want to talk to, see, or acknoweledge them. Society desensitized? My foot. The media wants you to think that.

(Edit: Mike, what is it like for you? I'm not being rude, but I would like to know why gays are attracted to the same sex. Is it forced, or like how you were raised? The more I know, the more accepting I may become, and this is an honest question.)

I just stick to myself. I was born this way. I don't advertise either. I believe in keeping that stuff private unless in a gay bar or something like that. Not all gay guys hit on straight men either.

CiscoKid · Post by **CiscoKid** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:39 pm

Originally posted by SannieRose
I figured you would miss my point, so let me repeat it:

If your sister solicits and performs sex in public places then she is no better than the deviates I have already described. Sorry buddy, homo's are sick and people like yourself only encourage their warped behavior.

I know plenty of female hookers, what you seem to fail to realize is that gay or striaght, people will do as they want. Nymopaniacs are nymos. LIVE WITH IT!!! The park you're talking about, is it in a bad area of town? most parks like that are in bad areas. I'm sorry if I offend you for NOT being mad about my sister being gay.

It's not like you can look at Mike and know he's gay. However...somehow gay folks seem to know who's gay and who's not...

Gaming-Module · Post by **Gaming-Module** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:43 pm

I think what gay men do (in the privacy of the public restrooms and parks) is disgusting. Any man who gets off by manipulating another man's rectum (and feces) is IMO mentally ill. To think these guys serve us in restaurants and teach our children - makes me puke.

If they kept it in the bedrooms, their actions and behavior would not offend the senses. There's a public park here in Atlanta that you can't take your kids to because these men openly solicit sex 24/7. Unfortunately, these guys have no morals or ethics. They are as depraved as child molesters and should be treated accordingly.

Wow.

Ignorance abound in this thread.

So these people are evil because of where they decide to place their sexual appendages???

Let me pose this scenario to you.

What would you say to a vegetarian who came up to you while you were enjoying a cheeseburger and told you that you are a
f()cking monster that rapes goats and fellates cows?

Of course, you would probably agree that this doesn't make you a monster.

You might even reason that people aren't evil because of what they decide to place in their belly.

See how absurd you sound to someone as logical as I?

If some gay/lez wants to move near me fine. I don't own the land, not my decision. But, I do not, ever, want to hear/see/hear about them doing their things. EVER. Nor do I want to talk to, see, or acknoweledge them. Society desensitized? My foot. The media wants you to think that

And what if they dont ever want to hear/see/hear (emphasis on hear?) you and your hetero ways?

Would you want someone breathing down your neck not to ever hug or kiss your wife outdoors or in public?

Would you not have a problem with somone that showed disdain towards you in a grocery store because you held your wifes hand?

I dont know about you, but there would be some answers or there would be some fists flying.

Think about it. It is a human right to express yourself freely. Not just through speech.

And for the record, I am an enlightened hetero, happily spoken for by a beatiful woman.

Paft · Post by **Paft** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:48 pm

Your argument is shot. IF I was a minority, and IF it offended the majority of people, I would keep my actions in secret, yes!

All I am saying is that I don't want to hear about some action that is offending to me except if it is in explanation of the driving forces, as per Mike's question.

Gaming-Module · Post by **Gaming-Module** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:49 pm

Coud someone explain how Paft admitting that he would give up his human and national rights damages my logic in anyway?

Gaming-Module · Post by **Gaming-Module** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:51 pm

So by your logic, black and hispanic people, when in the minority, should stifle any cultural signs of their individuality, to please the white folk?

Paft · Post by **Paft** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:53 pm

No, they cannot help being how they are. Gays/Lezbians make a concious choice. That's the diffrence.

Please, don't push this any more Macho.. I don't want a vendetta with anyone.

CiscoKid · Post by **CiscoKid** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:53 pm

Originally posted by Macho-Module

Wow.

Ignorance abound in this thread.

So these people are evil because of where they decide to place their sexual appendages???

Let me pose this scenario to you.

What would you say to a vegetarian who came up to you while you were enjoying a cheeseburger and told you that you are a
f()cking monster that rapes goats and fellates cows?

Of course, you would probably agree that this doesn't make you a monster.

You might even reason that people aren't evil because of what they decide to place in their belly.

See how absurd you sound to someone as logical as I?

And what if they dont ever want to hear/see/hear (emphasis on hear?) you and your hetero ways?

Would you want someone breathing down your neck not to ever hug or kiss your wife outdoors or in public?

Would you not have a problem with somone that showed disdain towards you in a grocery store because you held your wifes hand?

I dont know about you, but there would be some answers or there would be some fists flying.

Think about it. It is a human right to express yourself freely. Not just through speech.

And for the record, I am an enlightened hetero, happily spoken for by a beatiful woman.

RIGHT ON MACHO-MODUAL!!!

Saney, I have a very attractive girl I with right now who likes to make love out doors. Would yu find it disgusting if you walked by and saw a hetro couple almost on top of each other in a park? most people wouldn't. But two men, or two women? get your kids away! they'll turn them gay!

It's a fact of life it's like this...

SannieRose · Post by **SannieRose** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:53 pm

Originally posted by CiscoCert

The park you're talking about, is it in a bad area of town? most parks like that are in bad areas.

Wrong again (but then I guess you'd know).

This park is in the heart of midtown, Atlanta. An area with a median income of about, oh, $100,000

...and another thing, don't bother to compare the plight of hookers - most of whom are forced to do what they do to make a living - with the perverted actions of your friends whom are surely not forced into public restrooms to have sex.

It doesn't matter how you sugar-coat it, it's still sick

Paft · Post by **Paft** » Wed Aug 08, 2001 6:58 pm

Sannie, I agree with you 100%. It is sick, for us. Just, you may not want to start any fights with people in here... it'll make your life suck.