I May Deactivate My Facebook Account

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Lurch
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I May Deactivate My Facebook Account

Post by Lurch »

Facebook has been a mixed bag for me. Some FB forums have taught me some good things about how to improve my health and deal with some genes I inherited, but in other ways, FB has opened the door up to cyber bullying which I despise and can and will take control of.

I'm looking to forums like this as a safer haven from cyber bullies.
I don't think I need or want to throw away my PC, I just need to be more careful where I participate on public forums.
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Easto
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Post by Easto »

I've always considered that if you sign up at some forum or other social media outlet you have just as much right to leave it as you did to join it. You can usually tell how things are going to work out by the responses you get and the people you meet. Several years ago I joined a very popular, brand specific automobile forum. I was searching for some answers regarding some repairs I wanted to do. Some of the responses to my question were downright rude. Not just by one member but by several. I will admit that several of the "good" members did try to defuse the other members, but I just basically thanked them for nothing and never returned.

If you're not happy with a particular forum or any of the people are becoming abusive in your eyes... just walk away, it's not worth it.
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Lurch
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Post by Lurch »

Easto wrote: Several years ago I joined a very popular, brand specific automobile forum. I was searching for some answers regarding some repairs I wanted to do. Some of the responses to my question were downright rude. Not just by one member but by several. I will admit that several of the "good" members did try to defuse the other members, but I just basically thanked them for nothing and never returned.
I don't blame you. I've certainly been on forums like that myself. One is a big oil website, of mostly males. People can really be rude there. And some members stick up for others and try to fan the flames and victimize some people. Good place to read at only, and not say a word. It's just not worth it when you have to weed through to get the good replies.

I was posting on a local forum from my old home town 900 miles away. There were several fake people there, and today I finally came to the realization that I'm going to be much better off without this cyber BS in my life any more. The same thing with facebook personal messaging, there are many fake people with cards they're not showing, so that isn't going to be a replacement for real life friends.

I was given a CD with over 7000 vintage photos of our old home town area, but there are other people that have these photos too, and for me to post these photos, opens me up to fake people with hidden agendas. It's time I turn the page and let someone else post photos there.
It's done me more harm than good.
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YeOldeStonecat
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Post by YeOldeStonecat »

Social media and online forums have allowed a lot of people to pretend their "bullies" and act nasty to others...when in fact they'd never do that in real life.
"keyboard commandos".

I've learned to just ignore them. I also have cut back on many social media/forums....I'm down to just a few internet forums now, and for "social media"...I only do facebook...and I did remove myself from a lot of "groups" I was in. I mostly just participate in a few IT focused facebook groups now. And as I've gotten older, I find it's not worth the bother to get worked up from some of the people out there that live such miserable lives they have to crap on everyone else. It's best just to ignore them, focus on the "good people"...which there are many out there. I do get a lot out of certain IT related facebook groups....much more than the negative I run across.

Focus on the positive, ignore the negative. The world is filled with both, focus on the good, ignore the bad.
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Lurch
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Post by Lurch »

YeOldeStonecat wrote: I've learned to just ignore them.

Focus on the positive, ignore the negative. The world is filled with both, focus on the good, ignore the bad.
Facebook is OK for many people, but IMHO some people are best off to deactivate their account and stay away from it, and I did just that.
Sometimes, rather than blocking a few people you'd rather not deal with any more, because they're fake people, just deactivating your account is a better idea and sends a clear message. Then no one will take it personally bc they will think you had an issue with fakebook in general and not them.

I was on fakebook for about 14 years, and I'd like to go back to that time before I ever heard of it, maybe not in years, but in state of mind, at least.
I don't want to feel tempted to post on FB any more, so leaving is a better idea. I don't think I need FB.
I do like PCs and online reading and shopping, it's just that I got a belly full of FB.
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Lurch
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Post by Lurch »

There were too many fake people on my "friends" list and TBHWY I no longer wanted to deal with them so I deactivated my account.
There were some nice people too, but still, they're not real life friends so IMHO you can take them with a grain of salt.
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Lurch
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Post by Lurch »

Thanks for replying.
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Paft
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Post by Paft »

It's not a bad idea, really, to cut back from that sort of thing. I've also stepped away from social media by and large and site on a couple forums + IRC. Really, anything more formal than that just seems to lead to cliques and keyboard warriors (good term; definitely stole that) that makes the place unpleasant to be in.

It makes me appreciate here more. It's like coming home in a lot of ways, even if it is quiet.
So trade that typical for something colorful, and if it's crazy live a little crazy!
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Lurch
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Post by Lurch »

Paft wrote:It's not a bad idea, really, to cut back from that sort of thing. I've also stepped away from social media by and large and site on a couple forums + IRC. Really, anything more formal than that just seems to lead to cliques and keyboard warriors (good term; definitely stole that) that makes the place unpleasant to be in.

It makes me appreciate here more. It's like coming home in a lot of ways, even if it is quiet.
:thumb:
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Lurch
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Post by Lurch »

I feel a sense of relief.
By deactivating my FB account, I also removed hundreds of posts I made on three home town forums.
I had posted pics of family members and tried to get them removed with help of an admin, but some were not able to be deleted, but deactivating FB removes them all. I wanted to clear myself of those forums. Like wimping a hard drive clan, I wanted to clear my name of those forums, and I did. I was one of the few people willing to post vintage pics of our home town there. I just got to the point where I wanted to get out of the spotlight, and the day I started thinking about deactivating my FB account, and the more I thought about it, the more it seemed like a great idea. At last, a way to get free!!
It's easy to get into something like FB but after a while it seems like business as usual to go there every day, almost as if you should. It took 14 years to get to the point of where it was when I deactivated it, and deactivating my account with my name on it seemed like the really best solution to put an end to the abuse without unfriending anyone in particular. Now I no longer have to wonder if someone will not be nice to me on one of those forums, because I won't be there any more. I no longer will stick my neck out to have some f*cker cut it off.
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Post by triniwasp »

On the whole, the way many people use Facebook, makes it detrimental to other people who tune in. I have mostly disengaged from social media, however I remain for several reasons. I have to manage some of it for work. I use it to share my photography, it's the best place for vehicle insights, and it's the primary communication tool for some of my family members. Curating my feed has helped as well, but, ultimately, I just limit how much exposure I allow and I'm happier for it.
Feelings about religion: I believe in a dogma-free personal Prime Mover.
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Lurch
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Post by Lurch »

I'm using FB again with a new account mostly for forums.
I'm not going to add any friends this time, not unless the love of my life happens to step back into my life again, and in that case, I'm willing to change.
A man without love doesn't have any desire for friends. That's just about the size of it.
I had 138 people on my friends list, and one day I realized, this is not my idea of friendship.
Anyone can be manipulated on there, and that's not a game I'm willing to play, even if it means cats are my only friends.
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