Just thinking

blacklab · Post by **blacklab** » Thu Sep 17, 2009 2:31 am

· I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.

· There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.

· Life is sexually transmitted.

· Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

· The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

· Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

· Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?

· Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

· All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

· In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

· How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, bu t it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

· Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things and drink whatever comes out?'

· If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

· Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

· If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

· If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

· Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

· Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

· Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

MadDoctor · Post by **MadDoctor** » Thu Sep 17, 2009 9:37 am

blacklab wrote:·Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things and drink whatever comes out?'

me!

Roody · Post by **Roody** » Thu Sep 17, 2009 9:52 am

blacklab wrote: · If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

blacklab · Post by **blacklab** » Thu Sep 17, 2009 11:28 am

WOW! Thanks MadDoctor, now I know.

MadDoctor · Post by **MadDoctor** » Thu Sep 17, 2009 12:20 pm

blacklab wrote:WOW! Thanks MadDoctor, now I know.

NP. I know my dangly things........

RoundEye · Post by **RoundEye** » Thu Sep 17, 2009 1:32 pm

blacklab wrote:...There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead...

That is so very true. But I guess you could had “the lucky” to that list. Sometimes a little luck goes a long way.

MadDoctor wrote:NP. I know my dangly things........

Why does your knowledge of “dangly things” worry me?

Teirney · Post by **Teirney** » Thu Sep 17, 2009 2:41 pm

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Never thought of that.