Ok the truth

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Fri Oct 27, 2006 1:53 pm

tHE_0ne wrote:Hang in there man, sorry to hear about what your going threw sounds like hell, let me know if you need anything

Thanks bud

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 2:05 pm

bah 2nd day gone, got home early today.
Feeling better than yesterday, now i got 5 days off and then i have to wait for nov 9th.
No big hair loss, i just lost lots of weight and my hands/palms hurts like hell.
I think and hope all is gonna be OK.

MissTynker2 · Post by **MissTynker2** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 4:37 pm

There are times during treatments that it appears not much progress...then...BANG!...major improvements. Do not be discouraged. I shoulda made ya a wig from all the hair I cut off! Cheesh! What was I thinkin'! As to the weight...it will come back if you wish it too after treatments are finished. Pain in the hands and palms can be greatly relieved by both massage, and heat. Reflexology is also a marvelous pain reliever, and can also help with other unpleasant side effects as well. Rest!

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 7:13 pm

MissTynker2 wrote:There are times during treatments that it appears not much progress...then...BANG!...major improvements. Do not be discouraged. I shoulda made ya a wig from all the hair I cut off! Cheesh! What was I thinkin'! As to the weight...it will come back if you wish it too after treatments are finished. Pain in the hands and palms can be greatly relieved by both massage, and heat. Reflexology is also a marvelous pain reliever, and can also help with other unpleasant side effects as well. Rest!

Tinky thanks.
Yah, holy crap i had over 10 treatments already i'm not even counting them.I will have to ask next week.I cant get massage i got huge bruises and i'm using ice because it's so burning and hurting i wanna scratch it, christ i look really like drug addict.They gave me some cream for it but i wanna know if this is going to continue, where are they gonna inject me next.I hope it's not gonna be leg or neck?I have no clue.

I "shave" my head couple days ago 5mm and hair are growing at least at one thing i'm lucky because before i had to go to the barber 2x per month i got unbelievable hair grow

but now it's not like before.
Started using Tylenol3 even tho my fam doctor told me i had kidney stones couple weeks ago and i shouldnt be using it but hell at least it doesnt hurt.
Today is definately not xbox time

I had so so mood when i came back but now i'm miserable, completely ****ed and pissed excuse my language.
Yeah i'm going to bed in a few ......again ......

Jamie_R · Post by **Jamie_R** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 7:25 pm

hang in there man .... it's gonna get better

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 8:24 pm

Jamie_R wrote:hang in there man .... it's gonna get better

I hope so Jamie.
You know how it is, i think (correct me if i'm wrong) you was saying you got son with diabettes.
I'm using prednisone stereoids and they should keep me hungry but they also decrease immune system by 60%, last blood test my immunity was 2 vs 20, if i get flu or some virus i'm messed up.
Prednisone also reqeuires higher insulin dosages and when i get them and start vomitting my blood sugar drops to 1.9 sometimes even lower so i have to inject glucagon right a way.1 Injection of glucagon is 250 bucks.
After long using of prednisone it does something with your bones, they will start cracking up.
Great.
Anyway i'm not giving up ****ing never.
Critters got bath and now i'm really going to bed.
Thanks !

Jamie_R · Post by **Jamie_R** » Fri Nov 03, 2006 2:09 pm

wow man - I feel for you - I really do ...

it sounds like you have right attitude - keep fighting this - you're going to make it. Just believe in your heart that you will not give up - ever.

btw - my son isn't diabetic, but my father-in-law (who was as close to me as my own father) was. He had it pretty bad too, but his attitude was, and I quote, "if this sh*t wants me, it's gonna have to take me kicking and screaming ..." but thanks

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Fri Nov 03, 2006 10:35 pm

Jamie_R wrote:wow man - I feel for you - I really do ...

it sounds like you have right attitude - keep fighting this - you're going to make it. Just believe in your heart that you will not give up - ever.

btw - my son isn't diabetic, but my father-in-law (who was as close to me as my own father) was. He had it pretty bad too, but his attitude was, and I quote, "if this sh*t wants me, it's gonna have to take me kicking and screaming ..." but thanks

I will never give up.
This thing is not gonna break me, nobody did and nobody will.What's not gonna break you is gonna make you stronger.Like i said before i'm not gonna play Drama Queen and start 10 threads how sick am i and hoping how you all are gonna feel sorry for me with my bad luck in life

I appreciate the support who entered and replyed in this thread, it MEANS A LOT to me.Dont feel sorry for me, just wish me luck guys.

I'm gonna win no matter what

Your father in law ...hehe reminds me of my grandfather, he was drinker but not alcoholic, he always said if i'm gonna die i wanna die with good taste of wine in my mouth

(he shouldnt be drinking because his kidney were total mess).
Anyway, thanks Jamie

I have 3 more days before next treatment and i'm trying enjoy them as much as i can, after nov 9th i will know where i stand and they are gonna stop the treatments anytime soon anyway because its going for too long already.

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Mon Nov 06, 2006 3:19 pm

Just came back 1 hour ago, so far feeling same way like yesterday, no side effect yet.Wish me luck november 9th they are gonna take a look how its looking I HOPE REALLY HOPE IT'S GONE OR AT LEAST SMALLER !@!!!!!!!!!

MissTynker2 · Post by **MissTynker2** » Mon Nov 06, 2006 8:25 pm

<<<<<< is racing, and in the lead to be "unstickied" first!

knightmare · Post by **knightmare** » Mon Nov 06, 2006 8:37 pm

rivas wrote:Just came back 1 hour ago, so far feeling same way like yesterday, no side effect yet.Wish me luck november 9th they are gonna take a look how its looking I HOPE REALLY HOPE IT'S GONE OR AT LEAST SMALLER !@!!!!!!!!!

we all are behind you, prayers, support, & friendship.

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Tue Nov 07, 2006 12:32 am

MissTynker2 wrote:<<<<<< is racing, and in the lead to be "unstickied" first!

I'm racing for my life Misty, i dont care who will be unstickied first as long as we both are going to be OK.

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Tue Nov 07, 2006 12:33 am

knightmare wrote:we all are behind you, prayers, support, & friendship.

Sarahnn · Post by **Sarahnn** » Tue Nov 07, 2006 4:55 am

Keep up the good work, rivas!!!!! If you sense that it is shrinking....it most likely is. I'm thinking positive on this one....

More prayers going up...... Hang in there!!

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Tue Nov 07, 2006 3:06 pm

Sarahnn wrote:Keep up the good work, rivas!!!!! If you sense that it is shrinking....it most likely is. I'm thinking positive on this one....

More prayers going up...... Hang in there!!

Thank you
I just got back, little bit dizzy but still ok, no vomitting yesterday or today yet.I cant sense anything yet, the only thing what i can sense is my clothes are too big heh.
After thursday i will have 1 more chemo if everything is ok, if not "few" more

then break and then few more and THEN i'm DONE.But i will have to go for tests every few months they have many cases when it was gone and then it came back after few years and it was spread everywhere from top to bottom, i dont know from where this cancer **** came from it seems like every 5th person got it it's unbelievable wtf.I saw one guy in hospital they were moving him somewhere else, omg horrible look
I think i'm getting used to the poison i dont know heh.
I will survive i got tough roots.If not ....wtf no way, all depends on the results, they are not gonna mri just my head but whole body to see if it didnt spread somewhere else.
Philip my relative got in touch with that doctor and he is interested in my case.

Sarahnn · Post by **Sarahnn** » Tue Nov 07, 2006 6:08 pm

rivas wrote:Thank you
.

Don't you be thanking me. I should be thanking you for your candidness.

X O

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Wed Nov 08, 2006 4:01 am

Sarahnn wrote:Don't you be thanking me. I should be thanking you for your candidness.

X O

--,-,---@

Think · Post by **Think** » Wed Nov 08, 2006 5:17 am

Hang in there buddy.

It sure was a nice call from your Dad to help you out and am sure you have plenty of support around you for the road to healing.

In no time at all, this will be just a footnote of your lifes experience.

All the best.

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Wed Nov 08, 2006 9:30 pm

Think wrote:Hang in there buddy.

It sure was a nice call from your Dad to help you out and am sure you have plenty of support around you for the road to healing.

In no time at all, this will be just a footnote of your lifes experience.

All the best.

Yah i hope so Think ..............
Tomorrow (thursday) is my Judgment Day.
Really dont know what to expect .............................................

Debbie · Post by **Debbie** » Wed Nov 08, 2006 10:24 pm

rivas wrote:Yah i hope so Think ..............
Tomorrow (thursday) is my Judgment Day.
Really dont know what to expect .............................................

Keep on hanging in there. You'll get through this!!!

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 12:42 am

OK, this was my worst day ever.
I left around 11am and i just got home.
I had 2 catscans and 1 MRI + tons of blood tests + oncology, i was there 3 hours or so + D consultation + they did test on my brain if it's responding like it should, i had quite a few antennas on my head and that one went ok.Then they did hearing test again, that one was ok (thats bad i rather have maniere disease than cancer) and last one test i dont know how it's called but they locked me into sound proof room and they were sending sound over there it was freaky and i was told that one is ok as well.
The worst thing is i dont know results of the tests yet, i got only result from Dia test/hearing/sound prrof room/brain responce and my average glucose in blood is 25.6mmol/l.
I have 2 more chemo next week and thats it no matter what the results are.I will be on my regular medication + hormonal therapy but i will still have to be using orally some chemo pills.But thats not as bad as taking it intravenously.
RIght now i have to get my Dia under control and gain weight i was told i lost 43kg.
Oncologist told me i may be still able go for surgery all is gonna depends on the results, they are gonna be available in 2 weeks.But surgery is highly unlikely.Thats a short story.Long story is i was fing freezing all day long i had to take off my clothes and they gave me their blue hospital clothes and they were short ! the pants were under my knees

The people were nice (docs and nurses) and i'm exactly in same spot where i was before i know nothing.

Well i'm gonna know everything but i was hoping they will tell me results right a way.But it's same like last time, i had to wait as well.
Thanks for the concerns I hope it's gonna end up like it should, HAPPY END.
But even tho when i asked i was told i will go for tests and scans every few months because it likes coming back and spread unbelievable fast.
Thats it, i hope i'm not boring you with my "novel".

De Plano · Post by **De Plano** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 1:20 am

Wish I could send you one (or six)

Good luck man

Croc · Post by **Croc** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 3:42 am

Hey Tortoise Man. Read your latest and I hope you get all those answers you need. You certainly are being put through the mill.
Keep at em Rivas!!

A co-worker of mine told me yesterday about his brother (53) who was told he had indigestion for 4 months by the doctor. After convincing the Doc he ordered a camera down the throat and oops...... throat cancer. 18 weeks untreated and 18 months with Chemo treatment. That was 2 weeks ago and still no treatment.

Debbie · Post by **Debbie** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 5:10 am

Thanks for the update Eric! I know waiting for results is the worst part of this whole thing.

Jamie_R · Post by **Jamie_R** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 6:01 am

yeah, the waiting sucks, but hopefully you'll have some good news in the end!

Hang In There Bro

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 11:17 am

omg my english sux, i was just reading it over but i was in rush and so tired and wanted go to bed

13 more days guys, Plano i could use one

Jamie, Debbie, Croc ...yah no kidding i went through mill i'm hoping for the best.Geez dont tell me he had 18 months chemo treatment, i would dissapear.Sorry to hear that

Waiting for the results unpatiently seems like 13 years heh and hoping for the best.Like i said many times in this thread i'm gonna break this motha ****a

richardc · Post by **richardc** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 11:24 am

Hang in there my friend. You know I am rooting for you.

Jamie_R · Post by **Jamie_R** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 11:28 am

rivas wrote: i'm gonna break this motha ****a

QFMFT

stevebakh · Post by **stevebakh** » Sat Nov 11, 2006 4:11 am

I'm really sorry to hear it.

It really blows, there always seems to be someone falling quite ill. I really hope we find cures or preventative measures for cancers and the like during my lifetime. It would be a great achievement to witness.

I hope you pull through it, but can I ask a question? When you say worst case scenario of one year to live, does that mean there's a real possibility you can beat this thing and become clear of it altogether? I feel bad for you that they didn't diagnose the correct illness 3 years ago. Good luck!

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Mon Nov 13, 2006 4:31 pm

stevebakh wrote:I hope you pull through it, but can I ask a question? When you say worst case scenario of one year to live, does that mean there's a real possibility you can beat this thing and become clear of it altogether? I feel bad for you that they didn't diagnose the correct illness 3 years ago. Good luck!

I dont know answer to that question, i keep saying myself Yes i can but it's tricky answer.
I'm trying keep myself busy, i'm here most of the time, then nap and later playing some games with SG guys but always have to take dose of valium like for horse so i dont get some seizure from the tv.
Playing cards with wife, reading papers ...you know whatever keeps me busy and when i feel tired i go to bed.My big problem is my weight i lost too much and i'm not hungry at all some days i dont even eat, drinking water and thats it.Yesterday wife got really pissed so i ate a lot and today again she is preparing something but when it's going down my throat i wanna throw it out.
Tomorrow i have last chemo treatment, today i had one i took quick look here before i left and then i have to wait for results.
Cant say what i heard but some people are fighting it 12 months, 15, 2 years, 2 months ...some of them loose some of them will win but there is always gonna be hanging axe over our heads because you never know if it will come back and if it does usually it's fatal and spreading very fast.

I hope it's not gonna be sticking here for long time i'm becoming very unpatient thank you all for wishing me good luck.

Debbie · Post by **Debbie** » Mon Nov 13, 2006 4:35 pm

Try to each as much of a balance diet that you can hold down. It is so important to support your body while you are fighting this bitch!

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Mon Nov 13, 2006 4:38 pm

Debbie wrote:Try to each as much of a balance diet that you can hold down. It is so important to support your body while you are fighting this bitch!

Debbie, Debbie i'm trying, i'm so tired of this **** already its so heavy to carry it

triniwasp · Post by **triniwasp** » Mon Nov 13, 2006 8:44 pm

You hang in there buddy, your a trooper, a soldier and NOTHING IS GOING TO HOLD YOU BACK!!!!

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Tue Nov 14, 2006 2:14 pm

triniwasp wrote:You hang in there buddy, your a trooper, a soldier and NOTHING IS GOING TO HOLD YOU BACK!!!!

Debbie · Post by **Debbie** » Tue Nov 14, 2006 2:16 pm

rivas wrote:Debbie, Debbie i'm trying, i'm so tired of this **** already its so heavy to carry it

You are strong -- a lot stronger than you think.

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Tue Nov 14, 2006 2:20 pm

LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAST one today w00000000000t.
I'm so happy, but going to be more happyer if i receive good news next week thursday, already have appoitment scheduled

I shouldnt be thumbing up too much because i dont know the results and they dont know it too but i'm praying and hoping for the best.
Wife is gonna pick up medication what i got prescribed and i have to start using it tomorrow and i hope i'm gonna gain my weight back !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anyway i have to take a nap today i'm so tired but but my adrenalin is going crazy

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Tue Nov 14, 2006 2:21 pm

Debbie wrote:You are strong -- a lot stronger than you think.

I'm gonna rip over with chainsaw that motha ****a in my head

Jamie_R · Post by **Jamie_R** » Tue Nov 14, 2006 3:04 pm

rivas wrote:
I'm gonna rip over with chainsaw that motha ****a in my head

... and after playing Gears Of War with this gentleman, I can attest to the fact that he is hell with a chainsaw

Jamie_R · Post by **Jamie_R** » Tue Nov 14, 2006 3:05 pm

rivas wrote: Wife is gonna pick up medication what i got prescribed and i have to start using it tomorrow and i hope i'm gonna gain my weight back !!!!!!!!!!!!!

is the medicine to help you get your weight back?

Rivas · Post by **Rivas** » Tue Nov 14, 2006 7:16 pm

Jamie_R wrote:is the medicine to help you get your weight back?

Yes i'm already taking prednisone (not helping much) but they are gonna add hormonal therapy and chemo treatment but they are taken orally 2x per day.
Not intravenously

And i also got prescribed some red injections B12 and i have to inject them into muscle thats not a big deal.It should also help me gain weight too.
W0ah, now little bit scared of the results but i hope everything will be ok.