Wanna join my brand new cult

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 12:28 pm

!!!Now enrolling members for The Cult of Tao_Jones!!!

Now that all the politcal BS is over we can begin recruiting members for the Cult of Tao Jones.

============================================================================================

The basic tenents:

-Activites are but not limited to:
watching sports
video games
drinking beer
liqour
ogling gorgeous women
trips to the strip club.
-We do not discriminate...all races, creeds and religions are accepted (even Maddoc and Canadians).
-Political conversations are allowed as long as they are in reference to attractive members of the candidates party.
-MAXIM magazine is recommended reading.

============================================================================================

Members benefits:

-All you can drink beer night every full moon.
-Nifty pair of Nike Shoes.
-FREE BEER.
-All the pron you can handle.
-Name badges.
-FREE BEER.
-Access to the ultrasecret tree fort meeting spot.
-more to be added later.

Thanks for your support.
-Tao

Update...
Take the test its good for you as for me I sucked thats why I started a cult.
https://www.speedguide.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=157410

brembo · Post by **brembo** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 12:51 pm

I want a robe. I'll join if I get a spiffy flowing robe.

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 12:52 pm

brembo wrote:I want a robe. I'll join if I get a spiffy flowing robe.

No problem what color robe do you want.

wee96 · Post by **wee96** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 12:53 pm

Can I bring nekkid chicks?

brembo · Post by **brembo** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 12:53 pm

Yer the leader...you decide. I don't like castration too much either...suppose that can be outlawed in the cult?

ghost · Post by **ghost** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 12:54 pm

brembo wrote:I want a robe. I'll join if I get a spiffy flowing robe.

LMAO!

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 12:57 pm

Yes to the nekkid and any type of castration is a big hell no.

ghost · Post by **ghost** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 1:01 pm

I'm in.

Bastid · Post by **Bastid** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 1:48 pm

ghost wrote:I'm in.

Kyle · Post by **Kyle** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 1:49 pm

I'll pass, thanks.

brembo · Post by **brembo** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 1:51 pm

Kyler1 wrote:I'll pass, thanks.

Bawk, bawk...bawwwk! *struts about*

Chicken!

All the cool kids have ROBES now and little or no chance of castration. What's to lose? The tree-house is cool too.

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 2:14 pm

Brembo is 100% correct the tree house and robe are pimp and if Kyler doesnt want to play then thats cool we will just kidnap him and brain wash him later.

ghost · Post by **ghost** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 2:19 pm

Brembo & tao, you guys are crackin' me up!

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 2:21 pm

ghost wrote:Brembo & tao, you guys are crackin' me up!

I aim to please.

ghost · Post by **ghost** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 5:36 pm

Bump for cult member recruitment.

Zilog B · Post by **Zilog B** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 5:39 pm

Who controls the British crown?
Who keeps the metric system down?
We do! We do!
Who leaves Atlantis off the maps?
Who keeps the martians under wraps?
We do! We do!
Who holds back the electric car?
Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star?
We do! We do!
Who robs the cave fish of their sight?
Who rigs every Oscars night?
We do! We do!

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 6:01 pm

Who controls the British crown? - James Bond
Who keeps the metric system down? - centi/deca/deci/kilo what the hell is this?
We do! We do!
Who leaves Atlantis off the maps? - They have great beer it is to keep it for ourselves...cant have Miller going in there and drying it all up
Who keeps the martians under wraps? - It is at their request they have some wierd fetishes.
We do! We do!
Who holds back the electric car? - If all the cars are electric how can we huff gasoline.
Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star? - he was the bomb in cocoon yo
We do! We do!
Who robs the cave fish of their sight? - its dark in there what do they need to see for.
Who rigs every Oscars night? - LOTR earned its own
We do! We do!

brembo · Post by **brembo** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 6:04 pm

tao_jones wrote:Who controls the British crown? - James Bond
Who keeps the metric system down? - centi/deca/deci/kilo what the hell is this?
We do! We do!
Who leaves Atlantis off the maps? - They have great beer it is to keep it for ourselves...cant have Miller going in there and drying it all up
Who keeps the martians under wraps? - It is at their request they have some wierd fetishes.
We do! We do!
Who holds back the electric car? - If all the cars are electric how can we huff gasoline.
Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star? - he was the bomb in cocoon yo
We do! We do!
Who robs the cave fish of their sight? - its dark in there what do they need to see for.
Who rigs every Oscars night? - LOTR earned its own
We do! We do!

*kneels*
OH EXAULTED LEADER!
Your wisdom shines like the vaseline on a young mans bottom
The truth is stronger than toe-jam
The extasy of your words fill my loins

Gandalf · Post by **Gandalf** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 6:26 pm

If we're all naked in some huge underground place with hot chicks and beer... hell anyone would join right?

CableDude · Post by **CableDude** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 6:50 pm

Yes, If you have brunette women.

wee96 · Post by **wee96** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 7:01 pm

CableDude wrote:Yes, If you have brunette women.

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 9:44 pm

My friends we have women of all haircolors and enought to share with everyone

even 2 midgets with green hair for Brembo and his odd fetishes.

RoundEye · Post by **RoundEye** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 10:12 pm

National Organization of Men Against Amazonian Masterhood

........"Reverend Al" Al Bundy and his NO MA'AM cronies decided to form the "Church of NO MA'AM" to avoid paying beer tax. The movement gained momentum and Al became a televangelist preaching the NO MA'AM way of life.........

Gandalf · Post by **Gandalf** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 10:16 pm

Agreed with roundeye!

ghost · Post by **ghost** » Wed Nov 03, 2004 10:42 pm

Brent, you could live like this:

SRF01 · Post by **SRF01** » Thu Nov 04, 2004 2:15 am

Chicks... Beer... robes... Count me in!

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Thu Nov 04, 2004 8:26 am

SRF01 wrote:Chicks... Beer... robes... Count me in!

thats what i am talking about this man has ambitions.

Zilog B · Post by **Zilog B** » Thu Nov 04, 2004 8:35 am

Won't we have to sacrifice Brent?

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Thu Nov 04, 2004 8:38 am

schlurpee wrote:Won't we have to sacrifice Brent?

No sacrafices here...we can just get him a lap dance.

Lefty · Post by **Lefty** » Fri Nov 05, 2004 1:56 pm

I'm in

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Fri Nov 05, 2004 2:24 pm

lefty04530 wrote:I'm in

Hell yeah Lefty thats what I am talking about...free lap dance for you.

Ahren · Post by **Ahren** » Fri Nov 05, 2004 2:25 pm

I brought beer.

Let's do this thing.

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Fri Nov 05, 2004 3:55 pm

Jarngrimr wrote:I brought beer.

Let's do this thing.

weve got 5 kegs in rotation 5 new beers every month.

Ahren · Post by **Ahren** » Fri Nov 05, 2004 4:17 pm

So you don't want my beer?

Grimson · Post by **Grimson** » Fri Nov 05, 2004 4:23 pm

I like beer, wimmenz and wild naked titties.

Count me in !!

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Fri Nov 05, 2004 4:24 pm

Jarngrimr wrote:So you don't want my beer?

hell yeah we want your beer and your virgins

EvilAngel · Post by **EvilAngel** » Fri Nov 05, 2004 9:55 pm

I want to be a member!

What do I need?

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Sat Nov 06, 2004 1:25 am

EvilAngel wrote:I want to be a member!

What do I need?

the ability to drink beer and the love for the lap dance

you're in

EvilAngel · Post by **EvilAngel** » Sat Nov 06, 2004 1:25 pm

tao_jones wrote:the ability to drink beer and the love for the lap dance

you're in

Fo rizzel! w00t! I'm in a cult, I'm in a cult!!!!

tao_jones · Post by **tao_jones** » Sat Nov 06, 2004 1:30 pm

EvilAngel wrote:Fo rizzel! w00t! I'm in a cult, I'm in a cult!!!!

and your sig cracks me up.

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