Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror, complaining to my
husband
that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically telling
me it's not so,
he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion.
"If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of
toilet paper and
rub it between your breasts for a few seconds"
Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in
front of the mirror,
rubbing it between my breasts. "How long will this take?" I ask?
"They will grow larger over a period of years" he replies.
I stop. "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between
my breasts
every day will make my breasts larger over the years?"
Without missing a beat he says, "Worked for your butt, didn't it?"
He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again.
Stupid, stupid man.
The Miracle of Toilet Paper
The Miracle of Toilet Paper
"When the tides of life turn against you,
And the current upsets your boat,
Don't waste those tears on what might have been;
Just lay on your back and float."
And the current upsets your boat,
Don't waste those tears on what might have been;
Just lay on your back and float."
-
Joint Chiefs of Staff
- Posts: 42832
- Joined: Mon Mar 26, 2001 12:00 am
- Location: The Sandbox
