first date.. yes or no?

[lonewolfz28]

No opinion either way. I've been on both sides at one point or another (to have intercourse on the first date or not).

My first fiancee and I did it on the first date(high school dance). We still send Christmas Cards and I send presents to her kids.

My next serious girlfriend and I did it on the first date. Would've gotten married if she was willing to leave home. Just recently emailed her through her brother (good friend of mine) and now she's part of my email circle of friends.

My ex-wife and I didn't have it on the first date and she ripped my heart and checkbook out without remorse.

My ex-fiancee and I didn't have it on the first date and she still messed me over pretty good, but we're still friends.

My last serious girlfriend and I didn't do it on the first night we felt the urge and started the ball rolling, but she still ripped my heart out.


It all boils down to the persons involved. If you feel like it, do it. If the person turns out to be incompatable, blame it on the fact the person is incompatable, not whether you slept together on the first date or not.

I don't think any less of a girl whether we sleep together on the first date or the second, or even the third. More than that and I feel the chemisty isn't there unless her personality traits tell me differently. I've seen many girls that felt that once they gave in it was "all over except the crying".

I say they weren't very good judge of character to begin with to be dating someone they weren't comfortable with to begin with. And if they weren't comfortable with themselves, maybe they'd better get comfortable or wait until they were before they started getting that involved.

Just my .02

[EvilAngel]

no respect on a first date... if she does shes just a booty call afte r that...

[cho]

I wouldn't expect or ask for it on the first date, but if the situation arose I really don't know what I would do. Most likely turn it down because I only want to have sex with someone I have feelings for. But it all depends on my mood and mental state. If I lost respect for the woman most likely I would regret doing it myself which means I will also lose respect for myself.

As for premarital sex, pretaining to myself, I have no problem with that because under normal conditions I will only do it with a person I love and plain to marry. So I don't see a problem. If I plain to marry her and I do marry her....??? so what. I don't marry her I still have no regrets because at that time I did plan on marrying her. Just because you get married doesn't mean you have the right to have sex...look at all the divorces out there.

[vinnie]

In the event I need ever date again... I wouldn't see anyone again who even suggested that it was a possibility on the first date. Or second. Or quite a few after that.

After quite a while, I'd be forgiving if the issue was raised, assuming it wasn't already discussed in a different light, but unless that were accepting of my views and willing to wait, there would end the relationship.

No, I don't expect to have very much luck with any other relationships with my personal standards. Indeed, if I ever find myself single, I'll just give up on women altogether and concentrate on a career

[BaLa]

only read the first page..

sure sex is great....

but if a chick wants to have sex on the first date...somethings gotta be wrong
and yeah I suppose I would loose some respect also..

[Roody]

Originally posted by Meggie

wouldnt u lose respect for a girl if she 'gave it up' on a first date?

[YeOldeStonecat]

I would pretty much not respect the person as much as I would someone who maked you romance them for a while. Girls that sleep with me on the first date, chances are they've slept with a whole corral full of guys on the first date...the notches on the girls bedpost are most likely up into the double digits...hence not someone I'd want to be with/marry.

Girls that make you romance them, woo and coo them, take their time with you, I feel more guys will respect that...myself included.

Double standard perhaps? Well, right or wrong, I feel that the larger percentage of guys feel this way.

Downhill:"What if that first date is with someone you've known very well for say..ummm...a year? Two years? 10 years?"

That in my opinion is entirely different. Each has gotten to learn the other quite well, has studied them, watched them, become interested in the other...begun flirting for quite some time, or at least caught several lingering stares into each others eyes I'm sure. I'm well familiar with that route!

[jayyy]

I've had a couple situations where I met this amazing girl and we connected in this incredible way and talked until dawn, feeling like we'd known each other for so long, etc. So in that situation it was something different.

But I've had dates that were totally routine, get to know you type things, jobs, hobbies etc, and then we're making out and she's wondering where the condoms are. Again, if she just wants to get laid thats her thing. But if she wants a relationship, Big time no no.

At that phase, she can't possibly know me. She just has this idea of what I am to her, and she's lunging into things and make a relationship happen as soon as possible. Its a huge turn-off. Some guys are scummy about it and take advantage, others feel like they're being tricked or taken advantage of. I know how crazy and ungrateful that sounds, but thats the feeling. Because if she sleeps with you, you're this vile scumbag for not calling her the next day. Guys follow their dicks, then after they agreed feel like they've been roped in. Crazy, unfair, sexist and immature, maybe...but thats life.

[aagiants]

18 months, going strong, but no sex until after we tie, thank goodness she agrees too, cause i dont knwo how strong i can be with that subject

[chester]

ya , sex on 1st date=loose respect

im old school tho.

kids now adays, seems fine to them tho,<<what is this world coming too?