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  1. #21
    Tortoises R0cks :D Rivas's Avatar
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    Ya it's hard, I have been talking with people who got problems but to be honest there are people in way worst situations than me but also it's (how to say it) it shows the way of life they are living, bad decisions, not able to leave abusive husbands, kids ...and the list goes on.That group is not for me, I didnt introduce myself and I didnt say whats wrong with me I just wanted to listen, they were ok with it.
    I wish she can live in my heart but I dont have heart anymore, it's a rock and I'm not trying to say yeah Erik is the tough guy, I lost reason to live, I'm empty, mom is calling me every day and that makes me even more sad and I'm not picking up phone anymore.
    And why did I post it here ? No I dont want you to feel sorry for me, just sent some prayers for her, I needed to vent, I'm so but so pissed I cant even explain it.
    ALso feeling bad I survived that surgery this year, you know guys, why it's me who is living and not her, she had future, she was going to be doctor, I have been always black sheep of the family.
    I just ..I dont know.

    ......thank you for your kind words, many of you have been with me when I got sick and I appreciate it, I'm never going to forget.
    To be human is to choose.


    It is better to die on your feet
    than to live on your knees.

    - Emiliano Zapata

  2. #22
    A+, Security+, Mobility+ Shinobi's Avatar
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    bump one, for my pal Rivas.
    _______________________________________________
    Vendor neutral certified in IT Project Management, IT Security, Cisco Networking, Cisco Security, Wide Area Networks, IPv6, IT Hardware, Unix, Linux, and Windows server administration

  3. #23
    Rehabilitated Spammer Massa's Avatar
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    Dec 2002
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    You have every right to feel the way you do, just remember to take a few days, or weeks if necessary to let your feelings sort themselves out, it's not possible for you to be rational at the moment. She didn't deserve this, but you can honor her memory and over time you will learn to cope with what you are feeling. I'm sorry for your loss Erik, be strong.

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