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Thread: true story from the Word Perfect Help line

  1. #1
    R.I.P. 2015-05-13 minir's Avatar
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    Talking true story from the Word Perfect Help line

    Sent to me by my brotherinlaw from Hong Kong

    This has got to be one of the funniest I've heard of in a long time.

    I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired.

    This is a true story from the Word Perfect Help line which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department.

    Needless to say the Helpdesk employee was fired;
    however, he is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination
    without Cause."

    Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee (now I know
    why they record these conversations)!
    ----------------

    "Ridge Hall computer assistance; may I help you?"
    "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
    "What sort of trouble?"
    "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
    "Went away?"
    "They disappeared."
    "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
    "Nothing."
    "Nothing?"
    "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
    "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
    "How do I tell?"
    "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
    "What's a sea-prompt?"
    "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
    "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
    "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
    "What's a monitor?"
    "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV."
    "Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"
    "I don't know."
    "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord
    goes into it. Can you see that?"
    "Yes, I think so."
    "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the
    wall."
    "Yes, it is."
    "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables
    plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
    "No."
    "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other
    cable."
    "Okay, here it is."
    "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your
    computer.""I can't reach."
    "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
    "No."
    "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
    "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle, it's because it's dark."
    "Dark?"
    "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from
    the window.""Well, turn on the office light then."
    "I can't."
    "No?"
    "Why not?"
    "Because there's a power failure."
    "A power . . . A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you
    still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"
    "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
    "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was
    when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
    "Really? Is it that bad?"
    "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
    "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
    "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."

    regards minir

  2. #2
    Hawaiian Built fanta's Avatar
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    Good morning Minir.

    I've heard that one a few times before,

    don't know if its actually true but its

    a good story nevertheless. Actually I

    wouldn't be surprised if it were true

    knowing how some people are when it comes

    to using computers.

  3. #3
    R.I.P. 2015-05-13 minir's Avatar
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    Talking

    Hi fanta

    i had not heard that one before myself, my brotherinlaw works for Hong Kong tel or whatever they are called, as service co-ordinator.

    he sent it to me and i thought it plausable given todays climate.

    anyway good for a laugh.

    well i did my housework today, vacuuming, and scrubbing floors, plus cleaned up some plants.

    had not done much for awhile and it sure needed it.

    so i'm off to bed for a few hours hopefully.

    i'm a tired little hut slut.

    take care

    larry

  4. #4
    Elite Member Jim's Avatar
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    I love the answering machine one with the guys saying that the mouse is on the right side of the pad, but the cursor is in the middle, and he needs help. Don't know if its fake or not either, but I'm sure SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, SOMETIME asked that question.

  5. #5
    Shiney Happy People sito's Avatar
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    night cleaning minir?
    The more I drink, the less I care.

  6. #6
    New Member
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    Well, while we're on the subject, here's a real document actually written by Compaq: http://web14.compaq.com/falco/detail.asp?FAQnum=FAQ2859 Can't believe the stupidity of people. If they lived in a time when their lives weren't so secure, they'd have died long, long ago.
    Are you ready to be Jiggerized? http://jwa.n3.net

  7. #7
    R.I.P. 2015-05-13 minir's Avatar
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    Smile

    Hi Micand nice to meet you.

    i have a buddy up the road from you in Grande Praire. he's pissed because the weathers been so nice out there. hahaha

    it truly does make you wonder about some of our neighbors doesn't it. slow is one thing, stupid

    is something else altogether.

    grundy i don't doubt these things for a second. i used to work for some international companies

    and you'd be amazed at the questions asked of our tech. staff, and also some of the people i

    used to have to deal with as well.

    if nothing else, it used to make me take a fresh liking to myself.

    take care guys and enjoy the weekend.

    regards minir

  8. #8
    R.I.P. 2015-05-13 minir's Avatar
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    Talking

    hi sitosterol

    i got a bug up my butt to do what had to be done, i've been sick for awhile & it was messy.

    so i all of a sudden got ambition and went for it.

    geez 2am and i was still at it.

    also expecting a little company it helps motivate eh!

    clean house, clean sheets, dirty mind, all set.

    take care

    larry aka minir

  9. #9
    Senior Member grundy's Avatar
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    y'know, if people really call help lines because they can't find the "any" key and thus can't strike "any" key to continue, then maybe this story is true...

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